Paramore are my second favorite band, but the amount I talk about them, you’d think they were the only band I’ve ever heard of. Since my first taste in 2006, I’ve been hooked! If you’re friends with me, there’s about a 50% chance that we bonded through this group, in some way or another. Perhaps through fangirling over one of the below activities. Loads of people ‘like’ Paramore, but this year, I’ve seen that it can go way, way beyond that. Want to know if you’re in the Paramore ‘Fandom’? If you’re not sure already, here’s the test…
1. You know someone who went on Parahoy. Hell, you quite possibly went on Parahoy yourself. You won’t shut up about it, your cards are maxed out, and whether you went or not, you still cry about it! Rainbow Beard means something to you, and shouting “Washy Washy…” at someone isn’t totally weird. At least in your mind…
2. Somehow, this Fandom are all interconnected and you can easily do ‘six degrees of separation’ with almost every fan. When people talk about “that girl/guy who got picked to go up on stage for MizBiz”, you know that person by name. Even if you’ve never met them in real life! This can also be applicable in most cities. Worldwide. It may have even been you, at one point. If not, you hate them. “OH my GOD well DONE!!!” Ugh.
*(“MizBiz” also isn’t secret code to you).
3. You’ve probably spent a ridiculous amount of money in travelling to see them. By that I even mean internationally. Money may also have been spent on shit you love but don’t need… namely merch and Hayley’s wardrobe.
4. You’ve made the ‘pilgrimage’. Of course I’m talking about Franklin, Tennessee. What else could I possibly mean? Duh. You went there even if the only real thing you did was take a tour around a tiny museum with two cute little old ladies because you didn’t have the heart to tell them you came for some band, not the Civil War. Yeah, not sure who that happened to (!).
5. You get super defensive when someone says something like “Paramore? Oh I *love* her!!!”. The sane ones among us shake it off… I can’t speak for the rest of you. You’re pretty much also guaranteed to have an opinion on Josh and Zac. It’s inevitable.
6. You’ve met a member of the band. Maybe multiple times. Perhaps Hayley, Jeremy AND Taylor. And Aaron and…In fact, it doesn’t even need to be a member of the band. In this respect, it could literally be anyone remotely connected. Someone from Fueled By Ramen. Jeremy’s wife. Hayley’s sister/boyfriend/dog. You know their names, obv. You don’t really care, so long as you get ParaPoints. If you haven’t yet, you spend every waking moment plotting how you’re going to. And you say you’re not a stalker…
7. Everything you say about them can and sometimes does involve the prefix “Para”. You’re just not keen on that suffix. You know the one.
8. You secretly, yet consciously, compete to have the coolest ‘Paramore’ story. You want to be the one who wound up taking shots on a beach with Hayley and the entire Manchester United Football team, or something equally super-random. You don’t tell anyone you’re doing it, and you’re super supportive of other people’s tales (even when it’s something lame like the fact they heard Paramore playing in a store… because you know you’d freak out as well!). You’re also really jealous when somebody undoubtedly has you beat. But you can’t admit that, either.
9. You have a screenshot/story about a time when Hayley, one of the guys, or, again, anyone-they’ve-ever-met retweeted you or interacted with you on Twitter.
10. You have your Paramore/Parahoy friends… and then there’s like, you know, everyone else. And you’re not going to say it aloud, but you know which ones you prefer.